Disappearing Messages: Hidden Dangers Parents Need to Know
To watch and/or read the full event replay click here: https://smartsocial.com/post/disappearing-messages?org=ridleysd&ref=ejohnston@ridleysd.org
Disappearing messages have become a popular way for teens to communicate privately on apps like Snapchat, Instagram, and WhatsApp. While these features promise privacy by making messages “vanish” after they’re read, they can open doors to serious risks. From cyberbullying and impulsive behavior to data privacy concerns and predatory manipulation, disappearing messages create hidden dangers that parents need to understand.
In this SmartSocial guide, we’ll explore the top risks of disappearing messages, identify red flags, and offer practical conversation starters to help you discuss these issues with your teen, empowering you to support them in navigating the complex online landscape safely.
Top dangers of disappearing messages
False sense of security created by the belief these messages truly disappear. In reality they can easily be screenshot, recovered and shared
Escalating risky behaviors including making impulsive decisions and sharing inappropriate images
Vulnerability to cyberbullying due to lack of accountability and evidence, leading to emotional harm
Loss of oversight and control - not being able to provide guidance, leading to a parent’s feeling of helplessness
Privacy and security of your child’s data, due to your child’s false belief that the data they share can’t be captured by a third party and used by hackers
Long-term impact that can result from your child’s content being unknowingly captured and used against them, potentially harming their reputation or future opportunities
What parents need to consider about disappearing messages
Why does your child feel the need to communicate using an app with disappearing messages?
Where is your level of trust with your child?
If your child is moving between multiple apps to communicate using disappearing messages, this is a red flag
Have a conversation warning them of the dangers of cyberbullying and sending inappropriate messages/images
What predators say to kids on social media
“Let’s turn on vanishing mode” (so content will disappear)
“Set up another Instagram account and chat with me there” (finstagram accounts parents can’t see)
“You’re so pretty. I understand you, your parents don’t get you” (build trust/groom)
“Your parents wouldn’t understand, don’t tell them we talked” (hide the relationship)
“How old are you? Where are you? What school do you go to?” (collecting personal information)
“Here’s a photo of me, now send one of you” (pushing to get an inappropriate photo of your child)
“Send another photo or I will send this photo to all of your friends and family” (harassing, blackmailing, and threatening a student, causing extreme stress and humiliation)
Popular apps with disappearing messages
Snapchat - Pioneering the concept, Snapchat allows users to send photos, videos, and messages that disappear after being viewed. Family Center is Snapchat’s version of parental controls, but they do not allow parents to control the disappearing message feature.
Instagram - owned by Facebook/Meta, offers a “vanishing mode” for users to send direct messages that vanish after the receiver reads the message and the chat is closed. To send a vanishing message, open a direct message chat and swipe up. The screen will turn black and activate “Vanish mode”. Instagram offers Parental Supervision tools, but they do not allow parents to turn off the Vanish mode feature for their teens
WhatsApp - owned by Facebook/Meta, is a free messaging app for smartphones and desktops where users can send and receive messages, calls, photos, videos, documents, and voice messages. There are no parental controls built into Whatsapp.